Bullies

There are many types of bullies,
There are cyber bullies,
There are bullies at school,
The worst bully there is, is yourself.
I have been there, I know your pain.
I'm the odd man out,
I bully myself because no one did.
I never gave them the chance.
I bullied myself because I had to feel.
I was numb,
I couldn't feel, I hid all emotion.
I acted like I was okay.
No one cared, they all pretended.
No one was there when I needed them.
THEY SAID THEY WOULD!
THEY NEVER CAME! THEY NEVER CARED!
No one saw when I was me!
THE REAL ME!
THEY FEARED ME!
THEY JUGDED ME, said I was acting.
They didn't care if they did hurt me,
I hurt myself worse.
With words,
Truth,
"You're not good enough!"
"No one cares!"
I tried death,
I don't fear death, just what people would say after I died.
Pain,
I clawed at my skin,
No one saw.
I stabbed myself,
No one stopped me.
I WROTE MY PAIN EVERY DAY!
They said it was sad, I should write happier.
I wrote perfect little stories,
Nothing goes wrong.
"Aww your stories are so happy, life is not like that."
DON'T YOU THINK I KNOW?
I LIVED WITH SELF INFLICTING PAIN FOR FOUR YEARS!
MY WHOLE HIGH SCHOOL YEARS!
I want it to end!
IT ALL COMES BACK!
I want to stop,
I can't stop this monster I have become!
I can't stop myself!
I WANT TO FORGET MOST OF ALL,
YET MY NIGHTMARE LIVES ON,
I FEAR EVERY DAY THE ONE PERSON I KNOW CARES
THE ONE PERSON THAT MAKES IT ALL GO AWAY,
I FEAR ONE DAY HE WILL ONE DAY SLIP THOUGH MY FINGERS.
when I am with him, I am not a bully.
Just someone that overcame it.

Unlucky 13

I can't live without my bf... I can't wait to see him today I'm no longer depressed I heard... I feel happy and free I only feel pretty when my hair is straight....